Owning Who We Are With Confidence

In the car the other day, my husband, Aaron, was playing all these different songs, asking Ayla, my 9-year-old, "Do you like this one?" Ayla responded, "No." "Do you like this one?" he would say. Again, "No."

This happened several more times before Aaron finally responded, “You are very particular.”

Then Ayla shared a response that totally surprised me.

She says, “Obviously. I am a Scorpio.”

Holding back my laughter, I beamed with pride.

I couldn't help but admire Ayla's confidence. Instead of being defensive and saying, "I'm not particular..."—which we so often do when someone says something that we deem as "not good"—she absolutely took ownership of being particular, and she embraced it as a positive trait.

This reminded me of a client from years ago who was saying how her husband was always calling her "bossy." I responded, "Are you bossy?" She laughed and shyly responded, "Yes." "Have you been this way throughout your whole relationship?" "Yes," she said. "So what if... he likes that you are the boss? And what if the next time he calls you bossy you say, 'Thank you. Yes, I am.'" She laughed and agreed.

There is immense power in owning who we are. When we stop resisting our true selves and start embracing our unique qualities, we not only become more confident but also more authentic. This authenticity allows us to connect more deeply with others and to live more fully and freely.

Just as Ayla confidently owned being particular, we can all learn to embrace our traits—whether we're bossy, "extra," particular, quiet, or anything else. These qualities make us who we are, and when we own them with confidence, we can navigate the world with greater ease and joy.

So, let's take a page from Ayla's book and proudly own our unique qualities. After all, they are what make us beautifully, uniquely ourselves.