Leading with Compassion: Are You Walking Your Talk?

In today's fast-paced world, compassionate leadership isn't just a desirable trait; it's a necessity. It's the ability to inspire, motivate, and empower those around us. But to truly lead with compassion, we must begin by leading ourselves.

We've all heard the saying, "Be the change you want to see in the world." It's a call to action, a reminder that true transformation begins within. When we embrace this principle, we not only take responsibility for our own actions but also set an example for others to follow. Leading by example with kindness, compassion, and respect is the most authentic way to motivate and inspire those in our lives. It's about walking the talk.

With curiosity rather than judgement, reflect on the qualities of a Compassionate Leader:

Authenticity:

Leading with compassion starts with authenticity. It means being vulnerable, courageous, and real. It's about showing up as your true self, without pretenses or masks. Authentic leaders are relatable because they're genuine. They inspire trust and create a safe place for others to be themselves.

**Authenticity does not mean sharing everything with everyone. Knowing how and when to share is key.

Self-Love:

Compassionate leaders love themselves enough to let go of shame and step into their power as creators of their lives. They understand that self-love isn't selfish; it's a prerequisite for genuinely caring for others. When you love and respect yourself, you set a standard for how you want others to treat you.

Honesty:

Leading with compassion requires honesty, both with yourself and with others. It's about telling the truth, even when it's uncomfortable. It's also about being open to feedback and willing to admit when you're wrong. Authenticity and transparency are at the heart of compassionate leadership.

** Part of The Compassion Code Academy, our leadership and communication training, teach you how to speak your truth with kindness.

Curiosity:

Curiosity about others is a hallmark of compassionate leaders. They're genuinely interested in people and value their perspectives. Instead of jumping to conclusions or making assumptions, they ask questions and seek to understand. I call this benefit of the doubt thinking. This curiosity fosters connection and empathy.

Growth Mindset:

Compassionate leaders embrace a growth mindset. They're open to personal growth and improvement, recognizing that there's always room to learn and develop. This mindset not only benefits them but also sets an example for others to continually strive for betterment.

** Walking the line between accepting yourself as you are and being determined to grow and improve is a delicate balance.

Global Vision:

Compassionate leaders have a global sense or a greater vision. They understand that each person's contribution is invaluable and that true success requires teamwork. They see the big picture and recognize that it takes a collective effort to bring about meaningful change.

Team Empowerment:

Empowering the team is a crucial aspect of compassionate leadership. It involves recognizing and celebrating the strengths of each team member, allowing them to shine in their unique ways. Delegation is a form of receiving that lets others contribute their strengths. It's a win-win approach.

Compassion Code:

Living the Compassion Code means embracing compassion as a practice. It's not just a passive feeling; it's an active choice to show kindness, understanding, and empathy in every situation. Compassion isn't reserved for special occasions; it's a way of life.

Integrity and Accountability:

Compassionate leaders are in profound integrity with themselves. They own their successes and their mistakes. They practice accountability, recognizing that taking responsibility for their actions is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Forgiving:

Lastly, compassionate leaders understand the power of forgiveness. They practice forgiveness, both towards themselves and others. Forgiveness liberates the spirit and allows for healing and growth.

So, gently ask yourself are you walking your talk?

Remember, leading by example isn't just a slogan; it's a powerful way to grow, evolve, and elevate yourself. It's about setting the standard for the kind of world you want to live in.

In our ever-changing and often challenging world, compassionate leadership is more crucial than ever. It's the key to building trust, fostering meaningful connections, and inspiring positive change. It starts with each one of us, and it's a journey we're all on together.

And speaking of compassionate leadership, we're thrilled to announce that our next cohort of the Compassion Code Academy will kick off next month. If you're interested in joining us on this transformative journey, feel free to apply here. Space is limited, so reserve your spot and take a significant step forward in your compassionate leadership journey.

Let's continue to inspire and empower one another, walking the path of compassionate leadership. Together, we can create a world filled with kindness, understanding, and positive change.

Laura Jack
6 Self-Care Reminders For Navigating the Post-Vacation Transition

After an incredible summer adventure with my family, I'm back home, and the reality of everyday life is sinking in. As someone who teaches self-compassion, I understand the importance of being kind to oneself, especially during this transition period. It's all too easy to fall into the trap of feeling unproductive or scattered. Just know that you are worthy of love, and your worth isn't tied to your productivity.

Here are 6 self-care reminders to help you through this transition:

1. Clear the Clutter:

The first step to regaining your sense of balance is to declutter your space. Start with your physical surroundings. Tidy up your home, organize your workspace, and clear away the post-vacation chaos. A clean and organized environment can help you think more clearly and feel more in control.

2. Do Some Healthy Movement:

Physical activity is a great way to reconnect with your body and boost your mood. Whether it's a brisk walk, yoga, or a favorite workout routine, moving your body can release those feel-good endorphins and help you regain your focus.

3. Drink Lots of Water:

Hydration is essential, and it's often overlooked. Drinking plenty of water can help you feel more energized and alert. It's a simple but effective way to take care of yourself as you settle back into your routine.

4. Rest:

Remember that your body and mind may need some extra rest after an adventure-filled vacation. Give yourself permission to nap, take short breaks throughout the day, and sleep in this weekend. Rest is an essential component of self-compassion.

5. Be Present:

As you transition back to your daily life, practice being present in the moment. It's easy to get caught up in thoughts of what needs to be done or what you might have missed during your time away. Get back in your body by bringing your attention to your 5 senses. Mindfulness can help reduce stress and increase your overall well-being.

6. Make a Plan:

Lastly, create a plan for the upcoming weeks. I like to make a brain dump list where I get everything out of my head and onto paper. From there I can prioritize for both work and personal life. Having a plan in place can give you a sense of direction and purpose as you move forward.

Remember, it's perfectly okay to feel a bit scattered when transitioning from a vacation mindset to your daily routine. Self-compassion is about treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you offer to others. Embrace these simple self-care practices, and you'll find your center once again.

So, whether you're just returning from a vacation or facing any challenging transition in life, take a moment to be compassionate with yourself. You are worthy, lovable, and fully capable of navigating this journey.

If you haven’t already, take our Self-WELLth Assessment to reflect on how well you are treating yourself in the different areas of life.

Laura Jack
Unlocking Leadership Confidence: From Boardroom to Home

As high achievers, many of my clients have reached remarkable success in their careers, making a significant impact on the lives of those they've encountered. They've climbed the corporate ladder, built impressive resumes, and earned positions of leadership. Yet, behind closed doors, a different narrative often unfolds. A narrative of self-doubt, uncertainty, and a struggle for confidence, particularly in the realm of personal relationships and family dynamics.

It's a paradox that can leave these accomplished individuals feeling at odds with themselves. They excel in the professional arena, where their leadership and expertise are revered, but when they step into their homes, they're faced with an unsettling sense of inadequacy. The desire to be exceptional in all aspects of life, coupled with the frustration of feeling less competent at home, can create a profound internal conflict.

Imagine this scenario: a successful executive who commands the respect of their colleagues, making critical decisions with ease and influencing teams. Yet, upon returning home, they find themselves grappling with self-doubt and apprehension. It's not a lack of love for their family; rather, it's a sense of vulnerability that arises when confronted with the intimate complexities of personal relationships.

For these high achievers, wanting to be an exceptional parent, partner, or family member is a heartfelt aspiration. The motivation stems from a genuine desire to provide more, to offer the best of themselves to those they care about. However, the reality often falls short. Burnout can creep in as they strive to maintain the same level of performance at home that they do at work.

And yet, this yearning to be great is not a sign of inadequacy. Quite the opposite—it's a reflection of how deeply they care. Acknowledging this caring nature is essential, but so is remembering that self-compassion is paramount. No one is perfect; everyone grapples with moments of uncertainty. It's in these moments that the Maya Angelou quote, "Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” holds significance.

The truth is, much of the way we lead, parent, and relate is influenced by our childhood experiences and role models. Often, this means we're operating on patterns and behaviors we learned unconsciously. Words attributed to Carl Jung echo in this context: "Until we make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."

If we genuinely want to transform these patterns and upgrade our leadership and relationships both at home and in the workplace, we need to do so consciously. A common question arises: "Shouldn't I already know how to handle these situations?" The answer is no. These skills aren't typically taught in school, and they're not innate to everyone. However, they are learnable.

The path to unlocking leadership confidence—both in the boardroom and at home—begins with acknowledging that these are learnable skills. They require a willingness to explore, reflect, and grow. As high achievers, this willingness is already part of their DNA; it's what has propelled them to success.

Understanding that they're not alone in this journey is vital. Many others have faced similar challenges, even those who outwardly exude confidence. This commonality serves as a reminder that the pursuit of growth is shared. And growth involves self-compassion—the recognition that, just as they extend understanding and forgiveness to others, they must do the same for themselves.

In essence, the shift from professional prowess to domestic confidence requires embracing the understanding that growth is a continuous journey. It's about consciously choosing to evolve, to bring to light what was once unconscious. With self-compassion as the guiding light, the intricate tapestry of leadership, relationships, and personal growth can be woven into a harmonious whole.

So, to those who wonder whether they should already know how to navigate these complexities, remember that you're on a path of continuous learning. And the willingness to learn, to explore, and to evolve is where true leadership, both at work and at home, is cultivated.

If this message resonates with you, and you're ready to bridge the gap between your personal and professional worlds, the Compassion Code Academy may be the next step. Let's embark on a transformative journey together that will empower you to achieve personal and professional fulfillment. You can apply here to learn more and determine if we are a good fit!

Laura Jack
Fearless Leadership: Harnessing the Power of Love and Authenticity

Leadership isn't just about the title—it's a profound journey that requires authenticity, vulnerability, and courage. Today, let's explore a pivotal mindset shift that can redefine your leadership experience: moving from a Fear Mindset to a Love Mindset.

In a Fear Mindset, leadership can feel daunting, burdened by questions like:

  • "Will they think I am doing it right?"

  • "What if they don’t respect me?"

  • "What if I am not cut out for this position after all?"

  • "What if someone else has a better idea?"

  • "What if I am exposed as a fraud?"

These thoughts are rooted in fear, self-doubt, and a lack of self-compassion. They are the voice of drama consciousness. But there's a transformative path.

When we practice self-compassion, self-love, and self-acceptance, our thinking shifts, and so do our interactions. We transition from doubt, fear, and comparison to an abundant, loving mindset—entering presence consciousness.

In a Love Mindset, leadership resonates with thoughts like:

  • "I am grateful for opportunities to grow."

  • "I am enough as I am. I respect myself, and others respect me."

  • "Being imperfect is okay; it encourages growth in myself and others."

  • "Together, we can find solutions that benefit everyone."

  • "I trust in my authenticity and ability to make a positive impact."

  • "Asking for help empowers me and others."

  • "Even without all the answers, I fully accept myself."

Adopting a mentality of abundance, remember: "If you bring a thimble to the ocean of abundance, you will take away a thimble. And if you bring a tanker, you'll take away a tanker." Abundance remains constant; there's enough for everyone—love, connection, power.

When you realize that love is abundant and you are enough, you'll lead with compassion, without fearing your own shadow or doubting your worthiness. You'll shine your light on others, elevating them without attachment.

The journey of leadership requires that we also embrace vulnerability and healing. We don't have to share our vulnerable truths with everyone. As leaders, it's vital to have the "right support"—a team that can hold space for our growth, challenges, and evolution. "Teach from the resurrection, not from the crucifixion," as Marianne Williamson says.

In our roles as guides and mentors, let's lead from healed places, not wounded ones. Vulnerability isn't weakness—it's strength. We hold space for others from a place of humility, recognizing that our journey is ongoing.

Remember, leadership starts from within. Shifting from fear to love creates a ripple effect, transforming not just your leadership, but the entire landscape around you.

If you're ready to embrace this transformative leadership journey and shift from fear to love, I invite you to apply for our upcoming Compassion Code Academy Leadership Cohort. This training will empower you with tools, strategies, and insights to lead authentically and compassionately. Spaces are limited, so apply now to secure your spot!

Laura Jack
The Art of Communication: Building Connections Through Words and Presence

As a child, I vividly remember my father saying, “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.” Over time, I've come to realize that both elements hold immense significance. Yes, the tone and delivery of our words are crucial, but the content of what we say is equally important. It's a dynamic interplay between what and how.

Consider the words you choose, the cadence of your voice, the nuances of your body language, and the intentions that shape your words. This intricate symphony of communication has the power to either strengthen or weaken connections. Before engaging in a challenging conversation, I make it a point to set the intention for a healthy exchange. I've learned that being mindful of my tone, ensuring it carries genuine curiosity rather than judgment, makes a remarkable difference.

One valuable lesson from my coach training has remained with me: humans are naturally drawn to "like kind." In the context of connections, this implies that individuals who harbor compassion for themselves and their struggles can more easily establish rapport with others. While we yearn to know we're not alone, we also seek acknowledgment that our experiences are uniquely ours. This profound commonality of emotions, the shared human experience, makes us inherently "like-kind" on a fundamental level. As a result, forming connections becomes not just possible, but often effortless.

The significance of nonverbal communication in rapport-building cannot be overstated. Here are some simple yet powerful tools:

  1. Sincere Eye Contact: While avoiding a stare, maintaining natural and gentle eye contact signals that you care, are attentive, and willing to be present.

  2. Align Words and Body Language: Ensure your body language aligns with your spoken sentiments. Facing the person with genuine eye contact reinforces your sincerity.

  3. Open Posture: Whether sitting or standing, keep your arms and legs uncrossed. Crossed limbs or turning away may inadvertently convey closure and disinterest.

  4. Stay Present: Engage fully with what the other person is saying. Even momentary distractions can make them feel unimportant.

  5. Address Distractions: Should you become distracted, honesty is the best policy. Admit your lapse and ask them to repeat their last statement. This genuine approach helps rebuild rapport quickly.

  6. Mirroring for Connection: At times, mirroring the other person's body language can foster rapport. This isn't about imitation but creating a sense of similarity. Subtle gestures of mirroring can establish a subconscious connection, enhancing the interaction.

Effective communication goes beyond words; it embodies empathy, respect, and understanding. By combining these nonverbal tools with the intention to communicate compassionately, we elevate the quality of our interactions. These practices not only build rapport but also nurture an environment where connection thrives.

In my journey with The Compassion Code Academy, I've uncovered a profound truth: compassion, a force transcending mere words, serves as the bridge that unites us, forging an unbreakable bond of shared understanding.

For a deeper dive into compassionate communication, join me by downloading The Compassion Code Starter Guide or join us in The Compassion Collective: Expert Coaching to Navigate Life’s Challenges With Compassion. Let's journey together in cultivating empathy and understanding through our words and presence.

Master the Art of Communication and Ditch the Drama

Last week, I shared a powerful teaching from The Compassion Code Academy on ditching drama and fostering healthier connections. Today, I want to delve deeper into a game-changing concept—the "preframe"—that my clients boast will completely transform your communication and set you up for success like never before.

A pre-frame is an invitation for others to meet you where you are. Sharing vulnerably allows them to see you as a human and takes away the guesswork of having productive communication. Imagine that you sharing what is true for you is like offering them the opportunity to ride the elevator with you instead of them having to take the stairs.

When we begin utilizing the pre-frame, we set ourselves and others up for success even more. By setting expectations appropriately, realistically, and kindly, you increase the likelihood of achieving the outcomes you desire while inspiring others to do the same.

When we neglect to pre-frame, we risk setting ourselves and others up for failure, disappointment, resentment, resistance, and disconnection. However, by simply taking a moment to share your intentions, you can completely shift the conversation in a positive way and pave the way for healthy communication.

Let's envision a scenario: You walk into a doctor's office. Instead of the typical form and clipboard, the office manager warmly greets you, saying, "Hello [Your Name], thank you for visiting us today. The doctor is running about 15 minutes behind this morning. We apologize for any inconvenience. Please relax in our lounge, where you'll find water and coffee. Your choice to entrust us with your healthcare is truly appreciated." These 20 seconds can work wonders, particularly for someone feeling nervous, overwhelmed, anxious, or time-strapped.

Here is one of my favorite pre-frame that I use often, "Hey, I want to share something important with you; is this a good time? If not, let me know when is. I don’t want to interrupt, and I want your undivided attention.”

If you're ready to ditch the drama in your life and become a more masterful communicator, even in challenging conversations, I invite you to apply for our upcoming cohort of The Compassion Code Academy.

This transformative communication and leadership training will empower you to improve relationships, communication skills, and overall happiness and success. Only 6 spots are available in this cohort, so apply now to secure your spot.

Don't forget to try out the pre-frame technique—it will revolutionize your communication!

Laura Jack
Elevate Your Connections: Break Free from Drama and Cultivate Genuine Relationships

Are you tired of drama and conflict using up your energy and holding you back? Do you crave healthier, more meaningful connections with the people in your life? If so, I have great news for you!

You're about to discover a transformative solution that can revolutionize the way you engage with others. And the best part? It's within your grasp. I want to share an exclusive teaching with you from The Compassion Code Academy—our leadership and communication training — that's designed to empower you with the tools to break free from communication barriers and foster genuine connection

Ditching the drama begins with setting ourselves and others up for success, especially when it comes to communication.

At the heart of it, all humans share the same three basic desires: love, safety, and belonging. Just like our bodies seek homeostasis, our hearts and minds yearn for peace. And here's the thing: we're all on the SAME team.

Here are a few tips so you can make sure that you and the people in your life are not only thinking you are on the same team but also acting like you are on the same team:

1) Offer gratitude, compliments, and support regularly. Remind others of their greatness and say thank you when they do something awesome!

2) Encourage others to use their strengths whenever possible.

3) Ask for what you need and acknowledge their needs too. Use "AND" instead of "BUT" to show inclusivity.

4) Collaborate with curiosity and find common ground. Say "that makes sense" to understand someone else's perspective.

If you're ready to ditch the drama in your life and become a more masterful communicator, even in challenging conversations, I invite you to apply for our upcoming cohort of The Compassion Code Academy.

Our transformative communication and leadership training will empower you to improve relationships, communication skills, and overall happiness and success. Only 6 spots are available in each cohort, so apply now to secure your spot!

**Remember, relationships are the glue that binds families, effective working environments, governance, and economies. It all starts with you and your relationship with yourself. Apply now to embark on this life-changing journey! 

Laura Jack
3 Steps To Give Without Burnout

If you are anything like me, a high-achieving, people-pleasing, perfectionist who is also extremely empathetic, there is a good chance you are either burnt out or on the road there...

Why? Because these qualities that lend themselves to traditional success, often have us giving at all costs (even our own well-being).

I wanted to share with you these 3 essential steps and practices that have helped me care for others without shouldering the burden of their pain and hardships.

Step 1: Shifting Our Mindset about Pain and Hardship

When we recognize pain and hardship as part of the growth journey, we can approach others' struggles with a different perspective. Instead of feeling compelled to fix them, we can acknowledge their experiences as an integral part of their personal growth. Understanding that people are not broken but broken-hearted allows us to offer validation and acceptance, rather than trying to provide unsolicited advice or judgment.

Step 2: Letting Go Physically

Our bodies hold energy, including the emotions and experiences we absorb while listening to others. After engaging in heartfelt conversations, it's crucial to release that energy. Take a moment to breathe deeply, inhaling love and exhaling pain. Take your hands and literally brush off any residual energy from your body, as if removing dust, and then shake it off, just like a dog would. Conclude with a cleansing breath, allowing yourself to let go of what is not yours to carry.

Step 3: Filling Yourself Back Up with the 3 P's

Play, pleasure, and personal expression are key to replenishing ourselves after offering support. Engage in activities that bring joy and stimulate your senses. Embrace playfulness through dance parties, creative hobbies, or exploring new recipes. Find pleasure in indulging your senses, savoring delightful scents, tastes, textures, sounds, and sights. Finally, embrace personal expression through art, music, writing, or any medium that allows you to authentically express yourself.

Remember, by caring for ourselves, we can show up more fully and authentically for others. It's a beautiful dance of compassion and self-care that creates a positive ripple effect in our lives and the lives of those we touch.

If you want some support around healthy boundary building, standing up for yourself with kindness, speaking your needs, or any other interpersonal relationship challenge, join The Compassion Collective: Expert Coaching to Navigate Life's Challenges with Compassion and Shared Humanity!

Laura Jack
3 Steps To Stay Healthy While Caring For Others

I am in recovery as a high-achieving, people-pleasing, perfectionist who is also extremely empathetic.

If you are anything like me, these lovely qualities can lead to burnout because we want to do well and often give at all costs (even our own well-being).

I wanted to share with you these 3 essential steps and practices that have helped me care for others without shouldering the burden of their pain and hardships .

Step 1: Shifting Our Mindset about Pain and Hardship

When we recognize pain and hardship as part of the growth journey, we can approach others' struggles with a different perspective. Instead of feeling compelled to fix them, we can acknowledge their experiences as an integral part of their personal growth. Understanding that people are not broken but broken-hearted allows us to offer validation and acceptance, rather than trying to provide unsolicited advice or judgment.

Step 2: Letting Go Physically

Our bodies hold energy, including the emotions and experiences we absorb while listening to others. After engaging in heartfelt conversations, it's crucial to release that energy. Take a moment to breathe deeply, inhaling love and exhaling pain. Take your hands and literally brush off any residual energy from your body, as if removing dust, and then shake it off, just like a dog would. Conclude with a cleansing breath, allowing yourself to let go of what is not yours to carry.

Step 3: Filling Yourself Back Up with the 3 P's

Play, pleasure, and personal expression are key to replenishing ourselves after offering support. Engage in activities that bring joy and stimulate your senses. Embrace playfulness through dance parties, creative hobbies, or exploring new recipes. Find pleasure in indulging your senses, savoring delightful scents, tastes, textures, sounds, and sights. Finally, embrace personal expression through art, music, writing, or any medium that allows you to authentically express yourself.

Throughout my journey as a highly empathetic person and a  Grief Recovery Specialist, these practices have helped me maintain my own well-being while supporting others (even through some of their toughest moments).

Remember, by caring for ourselves, we can show up more fully and authentically for others. It's a beautiful dance of compassion and self-care that creates a positive ripple effect in our lives and the lives of those we touch.

Which of the 3 steps can you implement right away?

Take our Self-WELLth Assessment to determine where you are on the road to burnout!!

Laura Jack
If I Am Lucky Enough To Be An Old Lady One Day...

Life has such an interesting way of teaching us what we need to learn. My education is around humility right now. Even the email I wrote you last week was like eating a big piece of humble pie.

I lived. The vulnerability of sharing my truth didn't kill me.

As I have been in deep reflection about my life, I have been revisiting my journals... not sure that you know I have been writing in journals since I was 16 years old... so I have A LOT.

I found a beautiful reflection that I would like to share with you from a couple years ago:

If I am lucky enough to be an old lady one day, I want to look back at my life and think:

I loved so, so, so, so much.
I learned so, so, so, so much.
I experienced so, so, so, so much.

I forgave often.
I apologized often.

I loved myself tenderly, and when I did I loved my family and friends freely.

I shared my love and vision of the beauty I see in others often.

I hugged a lot.

I faced fear.

I advocated for others. I advocated for myself.

I laughed a lot and surrounded myself with amazing people.

I saw beautiful places.

I cried often.

And I kept growing- even when it hurt.

I feel so much gratitude for the beautiful life I had on Earth.

Wow- what a life.

It was hard. It hurt. It was also incredibly amazing.

The lows accentuated the hights.

The highs made it all worth it. 


Does this speak to you and how you want to live your life?

If so watch my new 15 minute presentation called: The One Simple Shift to Uncover the Path to Authentic Happiness and Success! It was really fun to make, and I hope you enjoy it too!

Laura Jack
Getting To Know You! 🎶

I was re-reading my journal, something I do fairly often lately, and I thought I would share some of it with you so you could get to know me better. I would love to get to know you better too... so feel free to respond.

I am Laura Jack.
I am a teacher, a guide, a coach, a writer, a mother, a friend, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a storyteller, a comedian, a lover of life. I am a speaker. I am a soul. A spirit. A love.

I am here to shift the world into a more kind and gentle place- where people care about one another, themselves, and the planet.

I am here to lead by example.
I am here to demonstrate my compassion and my humanness.

I am here to help people love their bodies, themselves, and each other.

I am here to shine and laugh, cry and celebrate.

Everyone wants to be seen, heard, and accepted exactly as they are.
That is my mission - giving everyone a safe space.

My gift is seeing people. Really feeling them. Helping inspire them, breaking down walls, opening mind and hearts.

I am here to impact women and families -- humans who want to shine and thrive -- who care deeply almost to their own detriment.

Be seen. Be heard. Get coached.
Change your life.


I would love to learn more about you!
If you resonate with my message, please reply or schedule a call with me.

Laura Jack
Preparing for Father's Day

Father's Day is just around the corner and like all holidays, can come with some baggage.
Like Christmas, Valentine's Day, or its close relative, Mother's Day, Father's Day can bring up unresolved grief.

Whether your father is living or dead, available or unavailable, distant or over-bearing, there are always things we wish were different, better, or more. Perhaps your relationship with your dad isn’t what you hoped or dreamed it would be, your dad wasn't around when you were growing up, your parents divorced, you wish you could see him more often, or perhaps you’ve never even met your biological father, etc. Since family can be complicated, it is important to remember Father's Day can be too.

This also includes what it means to be a father. Father's Day can also brings up feelings for men who wanted to be fathers but aren't, who were fathers but who lost their children, or for fathers whose children are no longer in their lives.

Whether this day is a celebration or challenge, be compassionate with yourself and others, as everyone has a story and no relationship is perfect.

Below are helpful reminders as you embark on Father's Day weekend!

  1. If you have or know a great father, thank them!

  2. It is normal to have feelings of sadness, longing, or just wishing things were different, better, or more.

  3. Give yourself permission to feel however you feel.

  4. Whatever your story is, please know that you are not alone. If you have the best dad or the worst dad; if your dad died or you sometimes think that would make it easier; if your relationship with your dad is complicated and healing, or simple and growing; please remember that there is nothing wrong with you.

  5. You may look around this weekend or see a whole bunch of social posts with a whole bunch of people looking happy and celebrating their father, and you may even be one of them. Just know that underneath the surface, everyone has a story, no one is perfect, and we are all just trying to figure it out.

  6. If your dad has died and you miss him, this may be a special opportunity to spend time doing things you loved doing with him. You can also consider doing something that he loved. I encourage you to set aside time to honor him in whatever way feels good to you.

  7. If you have a less than loving relationship with your dad, living or dead, this may be a good opportunity to be kind to yourself. Perhaps do something for yourself that you wish your dad would have done with you or for you.

I hope that reading this message allows you to find peace this Father's Day. To all the Father's out there, good and bad, who gave us life-- thank you.

For more support around grief and relating to one another more kindly through the challenges of life, subscribe to our newsletter and download the Compassion Code Starter Guide here.

Laura Jack